About Me
Freelance commercial artist, married, two cats. Initiated into a Lineage based in Alberta, Canada. Thirteen years a Wiccan, and currently facilitating a monthly Full Moon worship group in my home city. I do Pagan PR when the local media thinks to give me a call. And in the great Mac/PC debate... our studio is all-Mac, all the time. ;-)
And now, a slide show...
Music
Broadway musicals; 70's and 80's pop
Movies
"A.I.: Artificial Intelligence"; "The Matrix" series
TV
Just about anything on The Learning Channel, Discovery Health, or PBS
I'm back again, after spending almost three and a half months away. Following my mother's death I scaled back on my internet presence quite a bit, but I feel that I'm ready to spread my wings and soar again.
What's new? The Winnipeg Full Moon Group is doing very well, and I'm busy planning a Samhain ritual for November 4th. At Samhain I'll also be starting a new personal "working" Book of Shadows apart from the Full Moon Group BoS that I've been maintaining... it's hard to believe that I've been practicing Wicca for almost fourteen years. There's so much to learn and discover...
Right now, all I feel is numb. And that's all I've felt ever since her death. It's... worrying.
I had promised to be her Priestess for as long as she needed me, so after her passing I spoke a blessing over her body and placed her ritual jewelry upon her. The jewelry was returned by the funeral home in the same container as her ashes, which are to be scattered off the West Coast.
Apologies for babbling. I'm finding it hard to think clearly at the moment.
Thank you to all who posted/emailed me expressing hopes for my mother's continued good health. Let me assure you that she died peacefully and painlessly, and as she had wanted -- in a first-class palliative care facility:
Here is her obituary as it appeared in the Winnipeg Free Press:
BARBARA LEONA SMITH May 17th 1936 - June 3rd 2007 Peacefully, after a valiant battle with lung cancer, at the Riverview Health Centre. Barbara, also known as “Lee”, was known and loved by many for her skills as a library technician and as a teacher. She established three school libraries in Winnipeg and ran several more before retiring in 2000. Barbara loved music, gardening, and animals, and faced her diagnosis of cancer with great courage. She is survived by her daughter Laurie and son-in-law George as well as by her beloved cat Mina, and by many friends and former students whose lives she touched. No one who met Barbara could forget her intelligence, willpower, and kindness. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Winnipeg Humane Society in Barbara Smith’s memory and in her name, toward purchasing a plaque in her honour. Please call 982-2041 for more information. Our sincere thanks to the staff at the Riverview palliative ward for their excellent and compassionate care. An informal afternoon of memories will be held at the Thomas Sill Auditorium at Riverview Health Centre, on Wednesday June 20th, from 2:30-4:30 pm. “In the arms of the Goddess, from death to rebirth, you shall go forth.”
Today my mother (who was diagnosed with combined non-small cell lung cancer and small cell lung cancer in early September of last year) got her long-term prognosis: the liver and bone masses are back, although the lungs appear clear, and she has six months or less to live. There's another type of chemo they're going to try, but the oncologist warned us that it has less than a 10% chance of having any effect at all. We have one last summer together, if we're lucky. By the time snow falls again, she'll probably be gone. After the oncology appointment we went out and had a nice lunch, complete with ice cream for dessert. Her appetite certainly isn't suffering -- nor, apparently, is mine, although my stomach feels completely clenched up right now. I am mostly numb. Every so often a white-hot ripple of emotion runs through me -- sadness, grief, incipient panic -- then fades away again. That's probably a mercy. My mother? She says she's not sad, that she's spent the last several months getting herself ready for this moment, but still... I don't know what to do for her. She starts the new round of chemo next Tuesday. Two days later will be her 71st birthday. On a more positive note, several suites are coming open in our apartment building and she's called the caretaker to make arrangements to see them. If she can move into the same building as George and me, that will make things a great deal easier as she gets closer to death (as opposed to our current situation where she is literally halfway across the city). Thank the Gods we live in Canada, where once you're registered in the palliative care system all your medications are covered as well as round-the-clock (if necessary) nurses to see to your medical needs. I think I'm going to go and lie down for a while. I still have to get work done today, but I don't think I'm capable of it right now.
The Full Moon Group had a really pretty altar this time around. :-)
The four tall candles (beeswax, black, blue, and purple) were for a spell of clarity and moving on while letting go of what we need to let go of in order to move forward in our lives. The bracelets were charged with waxing moon energy (energy of increase); the cords wound around them were color coordinated to match the traits that we wanted to improve in our lives. The little cat statue was charged with healing/helping energy for stray cats everywhere. The purple Goddess necklace was a gift presented to my mother in-circle to welcome her to the Wiccan path, and the mangano calcite was charged to help me feel better when I am depressed (the bell next to it was rung three times in order to cleanse it). The incenses in the little containers are ground frankincense and red cedar.
Next month will be our formal dedication to the Gods as a working group, since we’ve been up and running for two years this month. I’m so very happy for us and very excited! We’ll have an inner court (which will spend the next year developing our own Tradition and will probably end up being initatory) and an outer court (open to all).
The purpose of the Full Moon Group is largely one of training and teaching -- to provide new practitioners of Wicca with a place to practice the techniques of ritual in a group setting. Our focus is on the esbats rather than the sabbats, although from time to time we might choose to celebrate a holy day from the solar as well as the lunar calendar. We’ll be putting up a notice on Witchvox’s Witches of the World section, and already have a LiveJournal community set up.
From http://www.crystalforest1.homestead.com/incenses.html
Kyphi Incense
Author Unknown
(Kyphi Tsa)
This recipe was reconstructed from ancient Egyptian papyri. Although an ingredient or two may not have translated correctly, this should be pretty close to the actual incense used in Egyptian temples.
Ingredients
3/4 Parts Honey
3 Parts Raisins
1/4 Part Copal
1/4 Part Myrrh
1/4 Part Orris
1 Part Sandalwood
1/4 Part Storax
1/2 Part Frankincense
1/2 Part Cinnamon
Red Wine (enough to moisten mixture)
Benzoin (enough to roll balls in)
Thoroughly grind all ingredients separately, then mix together groups of ingredients by nature: resinous together, powdery together, etc. Finally, mix all batches together, add red wine to moisten, then roll into 5/8" balls and roll balls in benison. Lay out on waxed paper for a week or so, until firm.
CAUTION: Incense balls will look like donut holes. Be careful that folks know that these scrumptious looking balls of incense that you've left laying around are NOT edible!
The balls can be used when firm, but for best results, they should be allowed to cure a few weeks. Kyphi I've had for two years is better than ever.
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Yemaya Olokun01:34 AM CST